2009 is the year of revelations.
My whole life, I've been waiting for things to get better. To be different. I've been waiting for happiness.
And guess what?
Life does not work like that.
I thought that getting out of college, moving forward in life, getting a degree and starting my career would make me happy. All my life, I had worked hard in school to go to college. Because once I had that college degree and found a job in my dream career, I would be happy.
BIG. FUCKING. LIE.
If I ever have kids, I will never feed them that ridiculous lie.
Life should be about finding what makes YOU happy. YOU and YOU ALONE. Not what society tells you to do.
I fell completely off-track this summer. I learned a hard lesson. My last semester of college, I actually had things figured out. But instead of listening to my heart, I listened to THE LIE. And now? I AM COMPLETELY MISERABLE. I took everything that made me happy and LOST IT.
So what to do now? Basically, I have to backtrack. Take the things that are wrong in my life and make them right again. Because I had it right. I FUCKING HAD IT! At one point, I was happy. And now I have to do everything I can to make things right again. Otherwise I may go insane.
Growing up sucks. Why? Because bad decisions can ruin everything.